I will set no evil before my eyes

Because I had no internet, I got a little behind on my reading and am catching up today.  This was in yesterday’s reading, and it always makes me think of Karen. She is the one who first quoted to me, “I will set no evil before my eyes … ”  when we were talking about R-rated movies, music, halloween costumes, etc.

I think of that often, now. Shows like Breaking Bad or Dexter are critically acclaimed … but if you stop to really think about them, aren’t they a case of “calling evil good?”  We ALL do that in a degree; our hearts are deceitful and we convince ourselves that the wrong things we do are for a good cause, or are harmless, or can be seen in a positive light.  The character in Breaking Bad is dying of cancer; he needs to provide for his family, right? So what if he is cooking poison … drug users are making their own choice. He’s the hero of the show … and in Dexter, he’s only serial killing the bad guys, right?

Sigh. If only I could blame these shows for rationalizing evil and calling it good … but I do the same.

I can honestly say that my spirit is better, higher, healthier, and more joy-filled since Karen has told me that and I’ve tried to guard what I see and hear more.  Especially as far as music … Christian music may not be as exciting, really, as the jazz and blues and pop music I used to listen to – those can still get me fired up – but it surely does lift and calm my spirit. And in this world, that is no small gift.

Psalm 101
Of David. A psalm.
1 I will sing of your love and justice;
to you, O LORD, I will sing praise.

2 I will be careful to lead a blameless life—
when will you come to me?
I will walk in my house
with blameless heart.

3 I will set before my eyes
no vile thing.
The deeds of faithless men I hate;
they will not cling to me.

4 Men of perverse heart shall be far from me;
I will have nothing to do with evil.

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I will call this to mind

Today’s Readings
LAMENTATIONS 3:1-66 | HEBREWS 1:1-14 | PSALM 102:1-28 | PROVERBS 26:21-22

I think this passage is probably the “one” in the entire Bible that speaks to me the most, has upheld me the most, has encouraged and comforted and guided me the most.  I’ve gone to it again and again, and have shared it over and over with others who are suffering.

21 Yet this I call to mind
and therefore I have hope:

22 Because of the LORD’s great love we are not consumed,
for his compassions never fail.

23 They are new every morning;
great is your faithfulness.

24 I say to myself, “The LORD is my portion;
therefore I will wait for him.”

25 The LORD is good to those whose hope is in him,
to the one who seeks him;

26 it is good to wait quietly
for the salvation of the LORD.

I find this passage intriguing …

Hebrews 1
Are not all angels ministering spirits sent to serve those who will inherit salvation?

 

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What it’s all about

There is something I have finally come to understand and to really believe.

It isn’t about our circumstances, what is going on “in the world” or even in our immediate personal lives; all of that can be changed in an instant for better or for worse, and neither is a reflection of His love for us, really. His most beloved suffer greatly at times.

Blessings and trials both, always come back to the fact that in the end, it is really only about God and knowing that God is all.

 

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He Who Dwells in the Shelter of the Most High

Today’s Readings
JEREMIAH 39:1-41:18 | 2 TIMOTHY 1:1-18 | PSALM 90:1-91:16 | PROVERBS 26:1-2

This is such a beautiful, beautiful psalm.  This NIV version isn’t my favorite, but still …

Psalm 91

1 He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High
will rest in the shadow of the Almighty.

2 I will say  of the LORD, “He is my refuge and my fortress,
my God, in whom I trust.”

3 Surely he will save you from the fowler’s snare
and from the deadly pestilence.

4 He will cover you with his feathers,
and under his wings you will find refuge;
his faithfulness will be your shield and rampart.

5 You will not fear the terror of night,
nor the arrow that flies by day,

6 nor the pestilence that stalks in the darkness,
nor the plague that destroys at midday.

7 A thousand may fall at your side,
ten thousand at your right hand,
but it will not come near you.

8 You will only observe with your eyes
and see the punishment of the wicked.

9 If you make the Most High your dwelling—
even the LORD, who is my refuge-

10 then no harm will befall you,
no disaster will come near your tent.

11 For he will command his angels concerning you
to guard you in all your ways;

12 they will lift you up in their hands,
so that you will not strike your foot against a stone.

13 You will tread upon the lion and the cobra;
you will trample the great lion and the serpent.

14 “Because he loves me,” says the LORD, “I will rescue him;
I will protect him, for he acknowledges my name.

15 He will call upon me, and I will answer him;
I will be with him in trouble,
I will deliver him and honor him.

16 With long life will I satisfy him
and show him my salvation.”

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In a Nutshell

This morning I was thinking of the arguments for universal salvation. I was thinking of how they “sound” good to the ears; of how people who argue for it are able to appeal on an emotional level using reasoning that is certainly attractive.

But the arguments, boiled down, are based on very little scripture. And scriptures that oppose with their belief are brushed aside with an argument that certain words were “not properly translated.”  They have developed a very intricate (and baffling) translation for “eternal, everlasting” that means “eternal” for God … but not for punishment.

I’m not saying all of this to judge those who believe in US unkindly; indeed, many of whom I’ve met and talked with are very kind, sincere, tender-hearted. I know they are seeking just as I am seeking. I can only speak for what the LORD has shown me personally, and today’s readings were alllllllllllllll about US … putting it in a nutshell for me.

Today’s Readings
JEREMIAH 22:1-23:20 | 2 THESS 1:1-12 | PSALM 83:1-18 | PROVERBS 25:11-14

This first reading from Jeremiah 22, in a nutshell, tells me how we are to conduct ourselves …

3 This is what the LORD says: Do what is just and right. Rescue from the hand of his oppressor the one who has been robbed. Do no wrong or violence to the alien, the fatherless or the widow, and do not shed innocent blood in this place. 4 For if you are careful to carry out these commands, then kings who sit on David’s throne will come through the gates of this palace, riding in chariots and on horses, accompanied by their officials and their people. 5 But if you do not obey these commands, declares the LORD, I swear by myself that this palace will become a ruin.’ ”

Is this not another “nutshell” of sorts?  It is not hard to see the difference between a “dead” king and an “exiled” king and how it relates to resurrection and salvation.

10 Do not weep for the dead king or mourn his loss;
rather, weep bitterly for him who is exiled,
because he will never return
nor see his native land again.

I am very sorry to admit that Jeremiah 23 reminds me much of some (not all) who teach US.

6 This is what the LORD Almighty says:
“Do not listen to what the prophets are prophesying to you;
they fill you with false hopes.
They speak visions from their own minds,
not from the mouth of the LORD.

17 They keep saying to those who despise me,
‘The LORD says: You will have peace.’
And to all who follow the stubbornness of their hearts
they say, ‘No harm will come to you.’

This passage more than any other tells me that universal salvation is not Truth.  First from today’s reading in one version, then from my NAB:

2 Thes 1
9They will be punished with everlasting destruction and shut out from the presence of the Lord and from the majesty of his power 10 on the day he comes to be glorified in his holy people and to be marveled at among all those who have believed.

2Th 1:8  in blazing fire, inflicting punishment on those who do not acknowledge God and on those who do not obey the gospel of our Lord Jesus.
2Th 1:9  These will pay the penalty of eternal ruin, separated from the presence of the Lord and from the glory of his power

How could those be “incorrectly translated?  “Everlasting/eternal” comes from:

G166
αἰώνιος
aiōnios
ahee-o’-nee-os
From G165; perpetual (also used of past time, or past and future as well): – eternal, for ever, everlasting, world (began).

“Destruction/punishment” comes from:

G3639
ὄλεθρος
olethros
ol’-eth-ros
From ὄλλυμι ollumi a primary word (to destroy; a prolonged form); ruin, that is, death, punishment: – destruction.

Dear Father in heaven, I don’t always understand your ways; but I trust them … I trust you. I ask you to protect us all in our mind, body and spirit. Lead us to Truth; show it to us plainly so we understand; open our hearts and our minds and our eyes and our ears to what YOU want to show us and what You have for us to learn. Help us to see clearly and to believe.

In the name of Jesus I pray, amen.

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My Dad and Thessalonians

This passage holds a very special place in my heart.  In July 2002 I was sitting on my front porch in Zebulon, NC with a cup of coffee, reading the Bible and journaling when I read this passage:

1Th 5:16  Rejoice always.
1Th 5:17  Pray without ceasing.
1Th 5:18  In all circumstances give thanks, for this is the will of God for you in Christ Jesus.

I’m sure my journaling comments that day were fairly benign – we learn from our trials as much as from our blessings … that sort of thing. 

As soon as I closed my Bible the phone rang. It was my mom, calling to tell me that dad was in Omaha in ICU with a tear in his artery; she said it didn’t look good and whether or not I came home was up to me … but I probably wouldn’t make it in time to see him alive.

I did arrive in time to see him again. We were blessed with an entire day together, my mom and dad, brothers and sister.  Dad was awake and we talked, laughed, planned how the doctors would treat his aortic anuryism. 

But that evening when everyone else left for dinner, I was alone with him when he seizured or stroked, and died. I was able to pray to God and release my dad to Him, trusting in His ocean of mercy and love.

And I’ve remembered that passage ever since, PONdered over it, and I’ve really, deeply learned it.

I know, now, how Paul could give thanks for his trials. It isn’t so much what we learn, but for me it’s simply that when we turn to God, He draws us ever-closer to Himself.  It is how He accomplishes His work in us, making us holy.

1Th 5:21  Test everything; retain what is good.
1Th 5:22  Refrain from every kind of evil.
1Th 5:23  May the God of peace himself make you perfectly holy and may you entirely, spirit, soul, and body, be preserved blameless for the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ.
1Th 5:24  The one who calls you is faithful, and he will also accomplish it.

Thank you, LORD, for protecting me; for helping me to turn my face to you and not my back; for your timing and for making things clear enough that even I can “get it.”

And thank you for my dad, and his life. He was an extraordinary man, very kind and gentle and I loved him dearly.

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Feel Their Ears Tingle

Today’s Readings
JEREMIAH 19:1-21:14 | 1 THESSALONIANS 5:4-28 | PSALM 82:1-8 | PROVERBS 25:9-10

I cannot even imagine the terror of hearing the words in verse 3: “I am going to bring such evil upon this place that all who hear of it will feel their ears tingle.”

Jer 19:3  Listen to the word of the LORD, kings of Judah and citizens of Jerusalem: Thus says the LORD of hosts, the God of Israel: I am going to bring such evil upon this place that all who hear of it will feel their ears tingle.
Jer 19:4  This is because they have forsaken me and alienated this place by burning in it incense to strange gods which neither they nor their fathers knew; and the kings of Judah have filled this place with the blood of the innocent.
Jer 19:5  They have built high places for Baal to immolate their sons in fire as holocausts to Baal: such a thing as I neither commanded nor spoke of, nor did it ever enter my mind.

It sure makes me wonder why the world today has escaped the same punishment … we are every bit as wicked, going about our daily work of building wealth for “self” and ignoring the poor; aborting our unborn children and ripping them limb-from-limb from their mother’s womb; glorifying sexual immorality. Lord have mercy on us all.

I am definitely feeling led to “do.”  I’m not certain yet whether it is with Birthright, reaching out to mothers who feel a lone and afraid and need help; or maybe with Food at First helping to organize all of those meals for all of those people. They are both such awesome and worthwhile works.

I am praying for guidance and I think the “first step” is closer than I realized.  God willing, things will fall into place soon …

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Dark Night of the Soul

Dark Night of the Soul … I have experienced this valley along with its fear, frustration, and wrestling with God like Jacob wrestled with the angel.  It was not as long nor as dark as some people experience it, but I am so grateful, now, for that time of trial and to God for carrying me through.

I’ve read two really great articles about the Dark Night of the Soul, and want to post them here.

The first is from My Utmost for His Highest by Oswald Chambers:

He heard that he was sick, He stayed two more days in the place where He was —John 11:6

Has God trusted you with His silence— a silence that has great meaning? God’s silences are actually His answers. Just think of those days of absolute silence in the home at Bethany! Is there anything comparable to those days in your life? Can God trust you like that, or are you still asking Him for a visible answer? God will give you the very blessings you ask if you refuse to go any further without them, but His silence is the sign that He is bringing you into an even more wonderful understanding of Himself. Are you mourning before God because you have not had an audible response? When you cannot hear God, you will find that He has trusted you in the most intimate way possible— with absolute silence, not a silence of despair, but one of pleasure, because He saw that you could withstand an even bigger revelation. If God has given you a silence, then praise Him— He is bringing you into the mainstream of His purposes. The actual evidence of the answer in time is simply a matter of God’s sovereignty. Time is nothing to God. For a while you may have said, “I asked God to give me bread, but He gave me a stone instead” (see Matthew 7:9). He did not give you a stone, and today you find that He gave you the “bread of life” (John 6:35).

A wonderful thing about God’s silence is that His stillness is contagious— it gets into you, causing you to become perfectly confident so that you can honestly say, “I know that God has heard me.” His silence is the very proof that He has. As long as you have the idea that God will always bless you in answer to prayer, He will do it, but He will never give you the grace of His silence. If Jesus Christ is bringing you into the understanding that prayer is for the glorifying of His Father, then He will give you the first sign of His intimacy— silence.

This blog post really spoke to my heart about the Dark Night of the Soul as well.

“It is so dark in life. There seems to be no God at all.” I hear similar words echoed over and over in the letters people write me from all over the world. It might be experienced missionaries who have served for 20 years in a place, only to be disillusioned by their seeming lack of fruit. It might be a young guy struggling through family or spiritual wounds in life -or a young lady desperately trying to discern a vocation in darkness. But spiritual struggle comes to all of us sooner or later. Eventually when God sees that we are mature enough for unselfish love -pure love -real, sacrificial love -He hides His Face so that we can learn to search, to desire, to let go of all and everyone else in our quest to find Him and make Him our heart’s first love. But in the midst of such darkness within the soul, when God hides His Fatherly Face, how are we supposed to react in our lives?

God does not want us to give in to the darkness, saying ‘Woe is me!’ Instead He wants us to look at His Faithful Love through the eyes of faith and hope -believing when we cannot see and hoping when we cannot hear -He wants us to rejoice in trust. I think that the greatest weapon God gives us in the midst of deep darkness within the soul is the gift and virtue of Joy. No, maybe we don’t feel ‘happy’ in our emotions in such a state. But He wants us to allow the Holy Spirit (Who we cannot know by our senses, but Who we invite to live quietly within us) to birth forth His spiritual gift of Joy. And as He offers this gift to us, we have to use our little wills to go along with Him.

Joy is an ‘act of Charity’ as St. Thomas Aquinas would explain. And because Love is an act of the will and Joy comes from Love, then being joyful is something we can simply decide to live on earth, even in the Cross -especially on the Cross, the Epicenter of Love.

Did the people dying with St. Maximillian Kolbe feel happy and that is why they sang as they waited for death in Auschwitz? Or did they look in faith toward heaven and trust in the hope of the conquering Love of God and simply through this faith and hope decide to rejoice as they accepted the pains life dealt them? I think the latter is true. Although sometimes God gives miraculous graces to feel joy in the midst of suffering, most people are called to rejoice with Jesus on the Cross despite their contradicting feelings. And this decision to rejoice in trustful love is what makes Joy a powerful weapon. It says to God, ‘I will forget myself and how I feel inside, and I will trust You and love others anyway.’ It says to satan, ‘No matter how you tempt me to despair, I’m happy because I’m God’s.’ St. John Bosco used to say, “The devil is afraid of cheerful people.”

My brother Mike taught me early on during my time at Notre Dame (when I struggled never finding my place, not really having many real friends) that Joy is a decision. I needed to wake up every morning and decide to be happy and joyful. And as a Christian it is easy to do when we remember the Love of God that is always with us. “For what can separate us from the Love of Christ? Will anguish, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril, or the sword?… For I am convinced that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor present things, nor future things, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.” (Romans 8:35,38-39)

In the midst of great darkness the act of Joy can become a great light to others. In the midst of the greatest interior struggles in my life, I have learned to smile at Jesus and yell ‘alleluia’ even out loud -just to make the devil mad and to confirm in my own will that I want what Jesus wants -period -and I trust Him. The ‘saints of joy’ are my examples in this -for no matter how they suffered, they found a way to bring people joy because they loved. And when you walk into a room where there is a person who is sad or needing love -and you feel squashed within your own heart -but you decide to be joyful and force yourself to smile and speak kind words to them, somehow the Joy gives you a glimpse of the Light in your own heart as well. For Joy comes from the Holy Spirit -and when we are joyful, we are tapping into His presence singing within our hearts.

So, fight with Joy. The next time you feel steeped in depression in life or darkness in the spiritual life -look at God, wink at Him (even though you may not be able to ‘see Him’ clearly but through faith) and smile. Try to force yourself to be a happy person -it is a beautiful way of saying ‘Fiat, Father -Fiat, Jesus -I decide to love and trust in You.’

And who knows, you just might make someone else happy along the way.

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Homosexuality

I read a great blog yesterday. The author wrote a letter to her church, confessing that she is gay and although the church says one thing, it makes her feel another way about herself and others who struggle. It was very well-written and really touched my heart.

I think I have been given a great gift in the friends I have who are gay, and also in my being quite naive about it. I was able to get to know them and to love them as individuals long before I really understood what it meant, or before there was a “gay movement” or political activism on both sides.

In a nutshell, my personal belief is that some people are born gay. I think we are all born with strengths and weaknesses and I don’t know why some are given more difficult trials. But just as an alcoholic faces a lifelong struggle, I think gays are also in a lifelong struggle to put away their “earthly nature.” I don’t believe “being gay” is sinful, but I think the Bible is pretty clear that the act of gay sex is sinful and I think gay people are called into a life of celibacy.  I don’t think gay sex is “more” sinful than other sins … but like all sins we must work to avoid them no matter how many times we stumble.

I am glad that in general, society has become more accepting of gays. On the other hand, in some ways I feel like it’s gone a little too far in practically glamorizing it; I think there are young people who will experiment and choose the lifestyle who otherwise would not have and who were not born with a strong sense of same-sex attraction as some were.

“It’s all about balance.” I don’t think we need to glamorize it and to be very honest, I know one lesbian couple who I feel chose the path, rather than were born to it.  But I know others who were born gay, no question in my mind.

So what to do as Christians? I hate that gays often don’t feel welcome in our churches.  Jesus came for the sick and ate with sinners of which I am definitely one. Why would I try to tell another sinner they don’t belong or are not welcome?

On the flip side, I hate that gay activists disrupt church services to make their point. I don’t think churches should change teachings to follow societal changes – if the teachings are grounded in the Bible, what “the world” chooses to do is beside the point; we are to please God, not the world.

Sorry to get so chatty … that was just a really good blog yesterday and then today’s reading in my study dovetailed so perfectly:

Today’s Readings
JEREMIAH 8:8-9:26 | COL 3:1-17 | PSALM 78:32-55 | PROVERBS 24:27

5 Put to death, therefore, whatever belongs to your earthly nature: sexual immorality, impurity, lust, evil desires and greed, which is idolatry. 6 Because of these, the wrath of God is coming. 7 You used to walk in these ways, in the life you once lived. 8 But now you must rid yourselves of all such things as these: anger, rage, malice, slander, and filthy language from your lips. 9 Do not lie to each other, since you have taken off your old self with its practices 10and have put on the new self, which is being renewed in knowledge in the image of its Creator. 11 Here there is no Greek or Jew, circumcised or uncircumcised, barbarian, Scythian, slave or free, but Christ is all, and is in all.

12 Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. 13 Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. 14 And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.

15 Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful. 16 Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom, and as you sing psalms, hymns and spiritual songs with gratitude in your hearts to God. 17 And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him. (Col 3)

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Free Will (and other things)

Today’s Reading
JEREMIAH 6:16-8:7 | COL 2:8-23 | PSALM 78:1-31 | PROVERBS 24:26

WOW there is a lot today!  My brain is bouncing all over the place and I pray the LORD helps me to settle down, focus, pray, and understand.

16 This is what the LORD says:
“Stand at the crossroads and look;
ask for the ancient paths,
ask where the good way is, and walk in it,
and you will find rest for your souls. (Jer 6)

What a great way to start this morning … I want to know where the good way is and to walk in it; I desire rest for my soul.

27 “I have made you a tester of metals
and my people the ore,
that you may observe
and test their ways.

28 They are all hardened rebels,
going about to slander.
They are bronze and iron;
they all act corruptly.

29 The bellows blow fiercely
to burn away the lead with fire,
but the refining goes on in vain;
the wicked are not purged out.

30 They are called rejected silver,
because the LORD has rejected them.” (Jer 6)

I thought that passage was cool for several reasons. I love the imagery I often hear about how just as the silversmith removes impurities through fire, we are purified through our trials.

But this passage tells me that not all silver can be purified … if we are unwilling to let go of the wickedness He desires to purge from us, and if we cling to it by our own choice and free will, we will be rejected.

That is so clear to me in this verse, and sobering.  So much for calvinism, and universal salvation.

And speaking of “Free Will,” simply go on to this passage in Jer 7:

30 ” ‘The people of Judah have done evil in my eyes, declares the LORD. They have set up their detestable idols in the house that bears my Name and have defiled it. 31 They have built the high places of Topheth in the Valley of Ben Hinnom to burn their sons and daughters in the fire—something I did not command, nor did it enter my mind.

I know that some believe everything we say and think and do was scripted for us from the beginning, but this is crystal clear to me.

I think that’s why the next passage spoke to me so much – sometimes it is really hard for me to be firm in what I believe when someone else is speaking with great certainty or authority, explaining how I am wrong about something or not spiritual enough or not mature in my faith or deceived by “man’s teachings.”  This is how I feel about others sometimes and it makes me feel a little bad for judging them so, but at the same time I sincerely pray that God protect my heart and mind and spirit from being deceived.

18 Do not let anyone who delights in false humility and the worship of angels disqualify you for the prize. Such a person goes into great detail about what he has seen, and his unspiritual mind puffs him up with idle notions. 19 He has lost connection with the Head, from whom the whole body, supported and held together by its ligaments and sinews, grows as God causes it to grow. (Col 2)

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